WASHINGTON D.C.—Reports came in this morning from Pyongyang, North Korea that Supreme Leader (no pun intended) Kim Jong-un has agreed to dismantle and surrender nuclear warheads in exchange for a Supreme store built in the nation’s capital. Jong-un is a known lover of American culture and was recently photographed in a noticeably counterfeit box logo hoodie. After several of his affiliates risked their lives in order to let the Leader know his bogo was fake, it was decided that a Supreme store must be built at any cost in Pyongyang to avoid future embarrassment.
Potentially, Supreme founder James Jebbia has the fate of the world in his hands as he decides whether or not to open the store. He was quoted as saying, “If Kim really wants a store I’ll think about it. I’ve heard that resellers in NK will be thrown into prison, so it seems like a good market for people who are really in it for the brand. Keep an eye out for the North Korean flag bogo.”